


A Hell of an Argument

by blackat_t7t



Category: Suits (US TV)
Genre: Comedy, Gen, Hazing, Law School, One-Sided Attraction, Public Nudity
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-07-09
Updated: 2011-07-09
Packaged: 2019-08-03 07:38:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 863
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16321967
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blackat_t7t/pseuds/blackat_t7t
Summary: Harvey Specter can convince anyone of anything at any time.





	A Hell of an Argument

**Author's Note:**

> Imported from LiveJournal on 10/16/2018
> 
> Original notes:  
> written for a prompt [here](http://suitsmeme.livejournal.com/1110.html?thread=227414#t227414) at [](https://suitsmeme.livejournal.com/profile)[**suitsmeme**](https://suitsmeme.livejournal.com/): ”SO I was glancing over Gabriel Macht's IMDB page, when I noticed he was credited as "Naked Guy" in an episode of a TV series in 1997.“ Check out the videos [here](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t3rGgYw14ho) and [here](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lNzOZhFwxbw&feature=youtu.be&t=5s). Especially the second one.

 

Mike’s had three post-trial celebratory beers, and Harvey’s had four… Mike’s not quite sure how to pronounce that, when Harvey starts telling him about this insane hazing ritual at Harvard Law. “They waited until the beginning of the second semester,” Harvey says, “and then targeted whoever had the highest over-all GPA.”

 

“Three guesses who it was,” Mike mutters none too quietly, and Harvey smirks.

 

“I think you’ve got a pretty good idea. Anyway, each year this one promising student was put through a test to see just how well they could argue a case, no matter how ridiculous the case might be. They had to do something that explicitly went against the school’s code of conduct in the middle of one of their classes, and then make a case to the professor not only that they should be let off without punishment, but also that the rule was unfair or oppressive. If they could do both of those things, they would be safe from hazing for the rest of their freshman year. Suffice to say, before I got there no one had ever done more than get off on a warning, and then only after they begged for mercy in front of the entire lecture hall.”

 

“Just what was this crazy thing you had to do?” Mike asks, imagining what rules might be debated on a college campus. All he can think of is things like alcohol on university property or opposite-sex roommates, and somehow he doesn’t think that’s on the same level as what Harvey’s talking about.

 

Harvey just smirks and takes a sip of whatever it is he’s drinking, obviously enjoying making Mike wonder. Mike watches as the older lawyer slowly takes his glass from his lips and turns to him. “I had to show up to class completely naked.”

 

Mike chokes on his beer. It almost comes out his nose, and he grabs for a napkin from the bar and claps it to his face. Harvey reaches over and pats his back, hard, which doesn’t exactly help much.

 

“Naked?” Mike squeaks when he finds his voice. Harvey nods, seeming completely unashamed of the fact. Mike doubts he has much under that suit to be ashamed of.

 

“Completely naked. Not even a jock strap.” Harvey’s enjoying this way too much, Mike thinks.

 

“And?”

 

“Well, they told me I had to do it in Ms. Stuart’s class. I showed up with only my books and sat down like nothing was wrong.” Mike can just see a younger Harvey sprawled bare-assed in a seat at a lecture hall, casually chatting with his male classmates and flirting with the female ones, giving anyone who dares to look at him funny that trademark smirk of his.

 

“When she called me out on it, I told her that she could send me to the dean if she wanted to but following that rule would go against my conscience, because it was so flawed. Of course, she asked me what I meant.”

 

“Then I stood up and went to the front of the lecture hall and started speaking to the entire class. I told them that the practice of wearing clothes was the root of many social problems.”

 

Mike snorts, and Harvey raises an eyebrow. Mike waves a hand to tell him to continue.

 

“I told her that clothing created a tangible symbol of class and cultural differences that could be used to discriminate against certain groups. I said the covering of the body indoctrinated people to believe they should be ashamed of their bodies, resulting in an idealized sense of beauty that people would go to unhealthy lengths to attain. By ridding ourselves of clothing, we would stop associating the human body solely with sex, and would be able to appreciate the beauty in others respectfully.”

 

Mike thinks that the part about class differences is the antithesis of everything Harvey and his fancy suits represent, but he has no doubt that the man could give the argument convincingly. Certainly being naked at the time would have won over anyone interested in men.

 

Harvey pauses in his story and takes another slow sip of his drink, savoring it, and the opportunity to torment Mike.

 

“Well? What happened?”

 

“When I finished my bit, three women and a guy stood up and started taking their clothes off.” At Mike’s shocked look, Harvey shrugs and explains, “It was the 80’s.”

 

“After seeing that some of the women had taken their clothes off, the men started to get behind the idea of public nudity, and they stripped. Some of the girls were disgusted by that and walked out; others started taking their clothes off too. Some idiots just sat there and tried to pretend it wasn’t happening. The whole lecture hall was in chaos, and not one person learned a single thing. But I suppose no one ever told the dean about it, because I never got into any trouble.”

 

“And what about the professor?” Mike asks. “Did you manage to convince her that the rule was unfair?”

 

“Well,” Harvey says slowly, and pauses to flash a smirk at Mike, “she was one of the three women that got naked first.”

 


End file.
